C'est la vie

I haven’t been good at keeping up with the blog lately. Some days I am full of thoughts I would like to share with the entire world, and other days are spent reflecting in solitary silence. The words that I would like to share are most likely ones that would get me in trouble. If you know me, you know I am very opinionated and am (usually) not afraid to share my opinions. However, given the delicacy of our ongoing situation, I’ve learned that it’s best if I keep the known truths and opinions to myself.

I would love to tell you all that life is grand, and that after 10 months of hell things are finally getting back to normal. But that’s not the case, not yet, and maybe never. I am not ready to share the specifics of what is going on, but I can tell you that life is getting better. We have recently had a few positive breakthroughs and life is a little sunnier than it once was.

It’s a scary thing, to have other people determine what your future is going to be. Whatever our new future is, it will not be the same as the life we once had, but it will also not be any worse as long as we are together.

It has become a luxury to have my husband home, and we are thankful to be together every moment. I’ve spent the last few months doing a lot of soul searching. My motto in life, as cliché as it may be, is that all things happen for a reason. I’ve taken away a lot of life lessons from this experience. If nothing else, I appreciate life more, my children, my husband, my marriage, my family. I’ve learned who my real friends are, the ones that were just there when I needed them, not the ones who just wanted to spread gossip. I’ve learned that not all people can be trusted, and sometimes bad things do happen to good people.  

Days like today I just want to SCREAM at the universe, “IT’S ENOUGH! I’VE LEARNED SO MUCH! YOU CAN GIVE US OUR LIVES BACK NOW!” Then I remind myself that there is a plan, and I cannot always be in control of the plan or the outcome.  So for today, I will just stop and breathe and enjoy the moment because we have so much to be thankful for!

Enough depressing garbage… I am sure you all are much more interested in hearing about the good stuff J

Lucas has become quite a character. He is not afraid to tell you what he wants, and loves to goof off with his older brother. He is doing well in “school,” but his teacher sent home a typed note the other day stating that Lucas had very.bad.behavior one afternoon, and that we need to sit down and discuss this with him. The idea of sitting down with my two year old and having a very.serious.discussion. with him makes me laugh!

Max has become an outstanding student. He is the top reader in his class, and has become quite good at arithmetic. He marks the days with his spider-man calendar and there are big circles where he has written “PAPA HOME!” So sweet. He started soccer again last week. This year he is playing up a level, with the 6-7 year olds, and guess what? Yes, he is still the tallest on his team!

Rob is continuing to fight the good fight. His strength never ceases to amaze me. I’m so happy to have him at home now, and I have developed such a deep respect for single moms. It’s not easy!

I haven't been taking many pictures lately, but I will share a few of my favorites over the past few months 

Me and Max in North Carolina for Christmas

Lucas building at the Children's Museum in Winston-Salem, NC

The perfect size! (At the Children's Museum)

New Years Eve @ home

Sinterklaas brought Max and Lucas a new swing

Our lazy piglets hanging out during Christmas break. Proof that they can be sweet together!

 

Spring 2011

 Spring 2012

Our Soccer Star!

Lucas and Papa, Halloween 2011

2012

2011 was unquestionably the worst year of our lives. It was a year full of tragedy, heartbreak, tears, and uncertainties. This past year I lost a piece of myself, I lost some faith in mankind, and I was harshly reminded to always count my blessings.

2011 was a first for many life experiences, but it was also the first time in my life that I have ever truly experienced hate. I'm not trying to dramatize our situation, but I don't think that many people understand how severe our situation is. My family has been ripped apart, my husband cannot (yet) legally live in this country, we are in tight financial situation, and our future is about as certain as the Mayan calendar.

I digress. Back to my feelings of hate. I hated many people over the past year, and I think that I have every right to. We have been lied to, spit on, and drug through the mud. Why? Well that is something that we have been waiting for the last 9 months to get an answer to. Anyway, I've realized that the hatred that I have developed for certain people just isn't worth it. I will never forgive them, but this year I vowed to step on the memories of them like they have stepped all over us.

You see, I am starting 2012 off with a refreshed perspective on life. If I continue my hatred, my "why us," my false hopes for the future... then I may very well drive myself mad. This year I am giving the events of 2011 a chapter in my book of life, and I am moving on. I am stronger than those who have tried to beat us down, and I am going to begin each new day with serenity and the peace of knowing that all things happen for a reason.

I believe in karma, and even though the universe has an odd (sometimes perverse) way of working, I am going to take this experience and draw strength from it. I believe that the universe will take care of the people that have hurt us; but it is not my duty to hurt them for that only makes me as low as they are.

My hope for 2012 is for the families involved in the tragic events of 28 April 2011 to find peace. I hope that our family will soon be reunited, that my husband will find a job, and that I will finish my degree.

I hope this year brings happiness and health to all of you.

With love,

Whitney

Fall Break

While kids are off enjoying a break from school for the whole week, I am pulling my hair out with schoolwork and trying to figure out what to do with them! Thankfully yesterday was a holiday for Mimi and she was able to take today off. Tomorrow it looks like the boys are going to be heading to the university with me! I've got two friends that are willing to watch them while I go to class and take a midterm exam. Oh boy... it's going to be an interesting day to say the least! 

In all of the craziness of our lives, I do try to make some special time for the boys. This afternoon I was done with class relatively early, and I had time to make a fun Fall art project with the boys. Max and I made an awesome tree, and Lucas screamed because he couldn't have the glue made a lovely drawing!

Max worked hard to gather a bowl of leaves, acorns, and pine cones

And Mommy cut out a big tree from card stock

Then it was time to glue the "treasures" on the tree!

While Lucas wasn't screaming,

He had fun coloring his picture!

TA-DA! The finished product!

Lucas was stealing apples while I was using the hot glue gun

It's really hard to be mad at this face!

He now says "cheese" when I take his picture. Adorable? Yeah, I think so too!

This and That

Not too much has been going on here lately. We found a house, and although it's been a huge relief we are still waiting for the Air Force to get their you-know-what together and get us moved out. These past few months have been the most stressful and frustrating months of my (our) lives. I think we are all living to a day where life can just be normal again. Alas, life goes on and the kids sure haven't slowed down one bit! Max is busy with soccer two times a week, Lucas is a great little mascot for his big brother, and I am swamped with school. Thankfully midterm exams are over and it is all downhill from here!

I don't have many pictures to share today, but here are a couple that have been snapped thanks to me and another soccer mom!

Max in the lead! On days when he is focused, he is quite a good soccer player!

Focused and aggressive! They tell him to go after the ball and he will knock down any little 4 year old in his way!

Max and his good pal, Nicholas! Nick lives across the street from MiMi and he is also the coach's son. They have lots of fun playing together after school and at soccer!

Max had a birthday party last weekend

And Lucas got to tag along too!

And to finish up this week's update, an adorable picture of Mimi and Lucas on his field trip to the park!

Indian Summer

Who says late September means school, cold weather, and playing inside?

Although we are busy, we are trying to enjoy every last bit of summer that we can!

Because, well... it technically still is summer!

Splish splash was the only noise I heard this afternoon 

And we enjoyed the sun shining on our faces

Lucas took a late nap and missed out on the fun today, but hopefully he'll be able to join us tomorrow!

I'm so thankful to have enjoyed such a refreshing afternoon

With this sweet little boy!

Slaap kindje Slaap (Sweet Dreams!)

When our kids were born we made a bedroom routine from day one. Our kids had their own rooms for a reason, and they were going to sleep in their own beds at the same time every night. Making bedtime a routine every night since birth has made it much easier on us now. After we eat dinner our kids know what needs to be done, and most of the time Max gets started before I even ask him!

First our kids soak off all the caked mud off of themselves and wash each other. Max has become an excellent hair-washer these days!

Bath time is also a great opportunity to have some more fun before quiet time!

After we get p.j.'s on, the boys get ready for story time.

No matter what I do, I can't seem to get these pictures into a "landscape" view

So please enjoy some sideways pictures of our very sweet,

And very goofy boys!

Just as I was boasting about how amazingly perfect our kids our when they go to bed... I forgot to mention that they sometimes go to sleep on the floor while reading books :)

Lief, he? Our sweet "baby" boy

Sweet dreams everyone!

Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning?

I was 15 and sitting in my biology class. Finally the bell rang and I started walking across an unusually quiet campus to my next class. As I walked in the room I was shocked at the sight on the TV screen. A tower had been hit. "What a terrible accident," I thought... No more than 10 minutes later I watched another airplane fly into the second tower. I will never forget my history teacher saying, "Class, it looks like someone just declared war on America...."

9/11: The day that changed this country forever. I have a lot of opinions and emotions about what happened that day, but for now I would just like to take some space up on the internet to remember. Remember the courageous people that walked up the stairs, not down, in the WTC to open doors and help people escape. Remember the remarkable firemen, police officers, and public officials that made so many sacrifices. Remember the innocent lives that were unfairly taken. And remember the survivors and the loved ones left behind. This country, as well as many others can either focus on what a terrible tragedy this day was, get out their guns and start to fight, or model the humanity that was overwhelmingly shown that day. 

Often in the daily bustle of life it's easy to get caught up in ourselves. But today, try putting your iPhone down and talking to someone. Offer to help someone in need, or just be thankful for all of the positive things and people in your life.

After all, we never know what tomorrow might bring....